Have you ever really considered what money means to you? The fact is, money provides you with food and clothes, puts a roof over your head, and it may even buy you a few pretty baubles on special occasions. When asked to ‘dig deep’, what many people answer is: Money gives you FREEDOM - the freedom from worrying about the necessities of life and, perhaps, to attract the ‘wants’ as well. In short, the freedom that comes with financial abundance is in peace of mind.
Is it possible that this peace of mind can come regardless of the number of zeroes on your paycheque? Do we need to continuously work overtime or take on extra assignments to increase our income in order to achieve the happiness we seek? Do we have to win the lottery to make our dreams come true?
Recently I was introduced a professional 30-something woman and asked what she did at the federal government job. She said, “Count the days until retirement.” My interest peaked and I responded, “What do you do on a good day?” The response: “Wait to win the lottery.” She wasn’t getting rid of me that easy! I asked, “What would you do with the money?” The response, this time, was more surprising: “I would do more good.” When I ask her to name two more things she would do if she won the lottery, she answered: “I’d be single and I’d travel.”
Imagine this woman’s shock when I told her that I had already fulfilled all three of her wishes WITHOUT winning the lottery.
When she recovered (I jest), we talked about how these things are quite possible and how fashioning the life of your dreams is completing within your reach but, putting first things first, you MUST change the belief that money is the answer to your prayers.
All joking aside, this exchange made me realize that it is common to believe that happiness is tied to the almighty dollar. By the time we reach adulthood, we are conditioned to believe one or all of the following: Money doesn’t grows on trees. Money is the root of all evil. Money can’t buy happiness but it sure makes the hard times more comfortable. You may look down on people who are poor and look up to people who are rich. Either way, your perception of money affects how you view the world and what you attract in your life. Any time that we blame our situation on lack of financial abundance, it is that lack that we continue to attract. You may not even realize how often you think this way but with increased awareness, you can alter your negative perceptions of money, change your focus from lack to abundance and achieve the success you desire, financially or otherwise.
The truth is that happiness, and success – however you define it – can be experienced when you have financial abundance, but the reverse it not true. Having financial abundance does not preclude happiness. Lesson Learned.
If you need help defining and executing your personal vision of success, visit http://embracingpotential.com/
Professional Motivator, Lisa Payne, finds inspiration in everyday events to help others embrace their potential.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Pleasure versus Happiness
Today I thought about pleasure. In fact, I’ve been giving it a fair bit of thought over the past week. I have been crystallizing my personal vision of success and have identified a number of things that bring me pleasure that I feel compelled to include. What I have learned about defining a vision of success, however, is that ‘the devil is in the details’. The more you try to fit in the ‘how’ of your vision, the less likely you are to achieve it.
The book I am currently reading, “The Art of Happiness” devotes a section to the question of whether pleasure and happiness are the same thing. The disparity is explained as pleasure being a short-term experience whilst happiness is a state of being. Your personal vision of success is all about the state of being you wish to achieve. When you begin from that higher level of consciousness, the goals that you set along your journey will always be in alignment with what you truly value.
As I mentioned, to achieve a sustainable state of happiness, I would likely be experiencing significant and frequent doses of pleasure. This leads me to believe that to have happiness, one must experience pleasure. But I do not believe the reverse is true. On occasion, I have even asked myself if the ‘pleasure’ is really a mask for the lack of happiness in one or more areas of my life.
We all know people who fill their lives with fun-filled adventure. To some, they appear to be living life large and are, perhaps, envied. To others, their sense of reckless abandon is perceived as entertainment without depth of meaning. Personally, I don’t believe such judgments serve anyone and the only truth will come from understanding one’s own motivation whether you are the thrill-seeker, admirer, or critic.
To be sure, we’ve all experienced the fleeting but intoxicating rush of adrenaline that comes with pleasure. It makes you feel invincible. It makes you feel powerful and strong. The tell-tale sign is how you feel once the rush is gone… are you able to sustain that feeling of happiness or is it lost until the next thrill comes around? As with most things, it is our gut that holds the answer. Trust it. Listen to it. Understand it and take the challenge to create a life full of happiness… there, you will find all the pleasure your heart desires. Lesson Learned.
The book I am currently reading, “The Art of Happiness” devotes a section to the question of whether pleasure and happiness are the same thing. The disparity is explained as pleasure being a short-term experience whilst happiness is a state of being. Your personal vision of success is all about the state of being you wish to achieve. When you begin from that higher level of consciousness, the goals that you set along your journey will always be in alignment with what you truly value.
As I mentioned, to achieve a sustainable state of happiness, I would likely be experiencing significant and frequent doses of pleasure. This leads me to believe that to have happiness, one must experience pleasure. But I do not believe the reverse is true. On occasion, I have even asked myself if the ‘pleasure’ is really a mask for the lack of happiness in one or more areas of my life.
We all know people who fill their lives with fun-filled adventure. To some, they appear to be living life large and are, perhaps, envied. To others, their sense of reckless abandon is perceived as entertainment without depth of meaning. Personally, I don’t believe such judgments serve anyone and the only truth will come from understanding one’s own motivation whether you are the thrill-seeker, admirer, or critic.
To be sure, we’ve all experienced the fleeting but intoxicating rush of adrenaline that comes with pleasure. It makes you feel invincible. It makes you feel powerful and strong. The tell-tale sign is how you feel once the rush is gone… are you able to sustain that feeling of happiness or is it lost until the next thrill comes around? As with most things, it is our gut that holds the answer. Trust it. Listen to it. Understand it and take the challenge to create a life full of happiness… there, you will find all the pleasure your heart desires. Lesson Learned.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Opening Doors
As one door closes, another opens to a world of possibility. As we close one chapter in our lives, we begin anew with the exhilaration of hope and maybe just a little twinge of fear. It is exciting to venture into foreign territory without a clear road map – to go for a while where the wind blows you. This requires faith that all things happen for a reason and that there is a greater plan at work than we can see today. It also challenges us to make choices that may be different than the past, take risks and experience the journey on a whole new level.
One of my favorite passages of all time is from Robert Frost: “Two roads diverged in a wood, and I -- I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.” I have felt, lately, that my choices are becoming more unconventional and it really has made all the difference – to my level of self-esteem, commitment, and ultimately, to my happiness. I have given myself permission to take big leaps and trust that I know what is best for me and my family at home, at work, at play, and at peace. I have begun to live deliberately and choices are becoming easier. When I am tested to take the easy road out of habit, I make sure I PAUSE (Pause, Accept, Understand, See, Embrace) before I say yes or no. By doing this, I allow for new opportunities to enter my life and can experience the journey more fully.
We have all made difficult decisions to turn the page and allow newness to enter in our lives. Whether it is a new career, a new relationship, a new home, all of these changes are great in that they test our courage and our faith. It does take courage to throw away that road map and follow your instincts. If you really listen to your higher self, you will make choices that are in alignment with your personal vision of success. You’ll find so much enjoyment and satisfaction in the journey that you’ll soon forget those fears that once kept you sitting on the side lines or kept you in the same game, making the same plays and getting the same results.
Today, I finished reading Neale Donald Walsch’s “When Everything Changes Change Everything”. He says, “Life meets its purpose through the process called Change.” It is what allows us to learn and grow. So close the door to the parts of your life that don’t serve you and open up to a Life of Possibility. ‘Sign Up’! Lesson Learned.
If you want to know more about Living in Possibility, visit my website: http://www.embracingpotential.com
One of my favorite passages of all time is from Robert Frost: “Two roads diverged in a wood, and I -- I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.” I have felt, lately, that my choices are becoming more unconventional and it really has made all the difference – to my level of self-esteem, commitment, and ultimately, to my happiness. I have given myself permission to take big leaps and trust that I know what is best for me and my family at home, at work, at play, and at peace. I have begun to live deliberately and choices are becoming easier. When I am tested to take the easy road out of habit, I make sure I PAUSE (Pause, Accept, Understand, See, Embrace) before I say yes or no. By doing this, I allow for new opportunities to enter my life and can experience the journey more fully.
We have all made difficult decisions to turn the page and allow newness to enter in our lives. Whether it is a new career, a new relationship, a new home, all of these changes are great in that they test our courage and our faith. It does take courage to throw away that road map and follow your instincts. If you really listen to your higher self, you will make choices that are in alignment with your personal vision of success. You’ll find so much enjoyment and satisfaction in the journey that you’ll soon forget those fears that once kept you sitting on the side lines or kept you in the same game, making the same plays and getting the same results.
Today, I finished reading Neale Donald Walsch’s “When Everything Changes Change Everything”. He says, “Life meets its purpose through the process called Change.” It is what allows us to learn and grow. So close the door to the parts of your life that don’t serve you and open up to a Life of Possibility. ‘Sign Up’! Lesson Learned.
If you want to know more about Living in Possibility, visit my website: http://www.embracingpotential.com
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Take a Flying Leap
A new year. A new decade. Time for a fresh start. Some might call it a Flying Leap. For me, it’s taken the form of a huge career change, leaving the security of a job that I have held for almost 13 years to embrace my potential and strike out on my own. Like any dramatic life change, this decision was not made quickly but over time and really doesn’t come as a surprise to anyone who is familiar with my journey. Just because a decision smolders over time, however, it isn’t easy to walk out that door, leave a part of your identity behind, and boldly strike out into the unknown. But that’s what I’m choosing to do.
This isn’t the first time I have done something like this. But I am no different than anyone. We’ve all made choices in our lives where we have left behind a part of our being and taken a leap of faith that our next adventure will yield even better results. Such changes are essential for our continued growth and development. It is exciting but, at the same time, it can give your butterflies butterflies.
I have been waiting for the right moment to take this big leap of faith, just as I have before. I have been mentally preparing myself for life beyond what I know for certain and that has been helpful as I have put my affairs in order. What all this preparation doesn’t take into account are the feelings that you experience when saying goodbye to your past. Whether you are changing your job, relationship status, or home town, there is an inevitable grieving process that needs to be experienced by us of all in order to move on without regret or doubt.
We all grieve in our own way and will let go of the past in our own time, when we are ready. By acknowledging that you are, in fact, saying goodbye to a big part of your life, you honour your past as it is what brought you to this moment.
As one door closes, another one opens. Take a breath and walk through this process: PAUSE. Accept what is and what has been. Understand the lessons and why your journey has lead you to this point. See what is possible in your new life. Embrace Your Potential.
The world is waiting for you to show your true colors! Be brave. Be bold. Take that leap. It is my Lesson Learned.
Visit my website: http://www.embracingpotential.com
This isn’t the first time I have done something like this. But I am no different than anyone. We’ve all made choices in our lives where we have left behind a part of our being and taken a leap of faith that our next adventure will yield even better results. Such changes are essential for our continued growth and development. It is exciting but, at the same time, it can give your butterflies butterflies.
I have been waiting for the right moment to take this big leap of faith, just as I have before. I have been mentally preparing myself for life beyond what I know for certain and that has been helpful as I have put my affairs in order. What all this preparation doesn’t take into account are the feelings that you experience when saying goodbye to your past. Whether you are changing your job, relationship status, or home town, there is an inevitable grieving process that needs to be experienced by us of all in order to move on without regret or doubt.
We all grieve in our own way and will let go of the past in our own time, when we are ready. By acknowledging that you are, in fact, saying goodbye to a big part of your life, you honour your past as it is what brought you to this moment.
As one door closes, another one opens. Take a breath and walk through this process: PAUSE. Accept what is and what has been. Understand the lessons and why your journey has lead you to this point. See what is possible in your new life. Embrace Your Potential.
The world is waiting for you to show your true colors! Be brave. Be bold. Take that leap. It is my Lesson Learned.
Visit my website: http://www.embracingpotential.com
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Life on Cruise Control - No More!
Welcome to 2010 - a new year and a new decade. Today, I resolve to become laser- focused on my personal vision of success and encourage you to do the same. It is my intention to inspire others to embrace their potential and in order to do so, I must live authentically, in alignment with my life’s purpose. I am making connections for success with people who have found the courage to stop living life on Cruise Control. This new decade can also mark the beginning of a new life – one that is designed by you, grounded in your personal values, and fashioned with deliberate intent – this new beginning is possible if you shift gears and take back control.
This is not a feat for the faint-hearted. It requires determination, commitment and passion. It can be hard work at times. Alternately, it is easy to drive through live on Cruise Control, keeping the same pace, staying in your designated lane. It is comfortable to know the route ahead of you is predictable and familiar. There’s no risk to maintain the status quo and accept the ‘same old, same old’ as being good enough. For many people, this sense of security gives them peace; others experience it as boredom. Sometimes, people experience a discontent but they are not quite sure what it is. They are seeking fulfillment and often cover it up with addictions to work, alcohols, gambling, or sex. In doing so, they become even less aware of their true potential and the life of possibility that awaits them.
The ‘danger’ of Cruise Control is that you are never fully aware of what is passing you by. You give over control of your journey. You don’t really ‘feel’ the road. I, myself, drove this way for many years. On a cross-province trip about five years ago, I realized that my mind was so bent on the destination (the time I would arrive, the route I would take, the cost of gas) that I failed to enjoy the beauty of the trip. Ours is a beautiful province and I had never taken the time to simply appreciate it. With this wisdom came the knowing that I was living my life this way, too. Goal-oriented to a fault, I was focused on the outcome at all times, on achievement and reward. I was successful in the eyes of many but what I lacked was happiness. I covered up that lack for a while, pretending to be someone that I was not, deflecting focus from myself to others whose needs I put ahead of my own. When I was clearly exhausted and my spirit significantly beaten down, I got real with myself and stopped living life on Cruise Control.
I knew that in order for me to experience true fulfillment, I had to make some deliberate choices that would bring my life in alignment with my personal values. I have been on this journey for several years now and the results have been remarkable. No more life on Cruise Control for me. Sometimes, I veer off course, arrive later than expected, and even break down. But, more often, my journey takes me to places that are more beautiful than I could have ever imagined. I am grateful to have chosen to experience life in possibility, enjoy the ride, and embrace my potential. This life comes with risks. Take a risk! Take a leap of faith for 2010! I have. Lesson Learned.
Visit my website http://www.embracingpotential.com
This is not a feat for the faint-hearted. It requires determination, commitment and passion. It can be hard work at times. Alternately, it is easy to drive through live on Cruise Control, keeping the same pace, staying in your designated lane. It is comfortable to know the route ahead of you is predictable and familiar. There’s no risk to maintain the status quo and accept the ‘same old, same old’ as being good enough. For many people, this sense of security gives them peace; others experience it as boredom. Sometimes, people experience a discontent but they are not quite sure what it is. They are seeking fulfillment and often cover it up with addictions to work, alcohols, gambling, or sex. In doing so, they become even less aware of their true potential and the life of possibility that awaits them.
The ‘danger’ of Cruise Control is that you are never fully aware of what is passing you by. You give over control of your journey. You don’t really ‘feel’ the road. I, myself, drove this way for many years. On a cross-province trip about five years ago, I realized that my mind was so bent on the destination (the time I would arrive, the route I would take, the cost of gas) that I failed to enjoy the beauty of the trip. Ours is a beautiful province and I had never taken the time to simply appreciate it. With this wisdom came the knowing that I was living my life this way, too. Goal-oriented to a fault, I was focused on the outcome at all times, on achievement and reward. I was successful in the eyes of many but what I lacked was happiness. I covered up that lack for a while, pretending to be someone that I was not, deflecting focus from myself to others whose needs I put ahead of my own. When I was clearly exhausted and my spirit significantly beaten down, I got real with myself and stopped living life on Cruise Control.
I knew that in order for me to experience true fulfillment, I had to make some deliberate choices that would bring my life in alignment with my personal values. I have been on this journey for several years now and the results have been remarkable. No more life on Cruise Control for me. Sometimes, I veer off course, arrive later than expected, and even break down. But, more often, my journey takes me to places that are more beautiful than I could have ever imagined. I am grateful to have chosen to experience life in possibility, enjoy the ride, and embrace my potential. This life comes with risks. Take a risk! Take a leap of faith for 2010! I have. Lesson Learned.
Visit my website http://www.embracingpotential.com
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Putting Yourself First
Is it selfish to put your needs ahead of others’? I asked myself this question as I have made a decision that goes against what ‘most sane individuals’ would do because it feels right to me and I believe that it serves my higher purpose.
For as long as I can remember, I operated with the interests of everyone else ahead of my own. Growing up, my primary motivation was to gain the approval of my parents, my father in particular. I made choices that I knew would be well-received. I always chose the most prudent road and that which would garner me a reputation for being solid, dependable and consistent. And I was; true to my Taurean nature! I continued to make predictable and safe choices through my 20s and 30s, putting the needs of my family and employers first. Gradually, I began to see that my choices were not serving me and that changes needed to me made.
Over the past five years, I have been on a journey of self-discovery. While I have created a new life surrounded by positive people and experiences, all too often I found that my pattern of pleasing others had taken precedence. It is a habit that it deep-rooted but I am slowly overcoming it and, this week, I made a very big choice regarding my career that is entirely based on what is best for me! Of course, that’s when I wondered if I was being selfish.
Selfish: “concerned chiefly or only with yourself and your advantage to the exclusion of others.”
It is my belief that when you make choices that are in alignment with your values and are being true to your authentic self, you cannot be selfish. You see, as you embrace your potential, you empower others to do the same. While the people in your immediate circle may not agree with your choices, and some may even feel hurt by your decisions, it is you that you must face in the mirror each day and it is you that must go to bed each night fully responsible for your life. I fully understand this process as I have experienced it myself. However, I would much rather face the authentic Lisa in the mirror and go to bed each night feeling proud that my choices reflect my personal vision of success than to continue to live my life passively and to the tune of someone else’s drum. Then sense of peace that comes when you are living in possibility and integrity is worth any temporary discomfort. Those who wish that you truly embrace your potential will eventually applaud your courage and support the execution of your personal vision of success. When times with others have been difficult and I question my choices, I remember the poem by Mother Teresa which ends: “In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.”
Last night, I watched “Invictus”, a true story about Nelson Mandela, an inspiring man whose love for his country and fellow South Africans led him to make many choices that appears selfish to others. He read the poem of the same name by William Ernest Henley which inspired him to “stand while he felt like lying down” during his 30 years of incarceration. The famous words that began and ended the movie brought a surge of pride and peace through my body. He said, “I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul.”
Knowing this truth, feeling this inspiration, I have taken a huge leap of faith. I have chosen “the road less traveled” (thank you Robert Frost – I have always loved this poem) and expect it will make all the difference. We are entering a new year and a new decade after all. It is time for great change. It is time for greatness. This year I will turn 40. Isn’t it about time I started putting myself first? Lesson Learned.
For more on my philosophy, please visit my website: http:///embracingpotential.com.
For as long as I can remember, I operated with the interests of everyone else ahead of my own. Growing up, my primary motivation was to gain the approval of my parents, my father in particular. I made choices that I knew would be well-received. I always chose the most prudent road and that which would garner me a reputation for being solid, dependable and consistent. And I was; true to my Taurean nature! I continued to make predictable and safe choices through my 20s and 30s, putting the needs of my family and employers first. Gradually, I began to see that my choices were not serving me and that changes needed to me made.
Over the past five years, I have been on a journey of self-discovery. While I have created a new life surrounded by positive people and experiences, all too often I found that my pattern of pleasing others had taken precedence. It is a habit that it deep-rooted but I am slowly overcoming it and, this week, I made a very big choice regarding my career that is entirely based on what is best for me! Of course, that’s when I wondered if I was being selfish.
Selfish: “concerned chiefly or only with yourself and your advantage to the exclusion of others.”
It is my belief that when you make choices that are in alignment with your values and are being true to your authentic self, you cannot be selfish. You see, as you embrace your potential, you empower others to do the same. While the people in your immediate circle may not agree with your choices, and some may even feel hurt by your decisions, it is you that you must face in the mirror each day and it is you that must go to bed each night fully responsible for your life. I fully understand this process as I have experienced it myself. However, I would much rather face the authentic Lisa in the mirror and go to bed each night feeling proud that my choices reflect my personal vision of success than to continue to live my life passively and to the tune of someone else’s drum. Then sense of peace that comes when you are living in possibility and integrity is worth any temporary discomfort. Those who wish that you truly embrace your potential will eventually applaud your courage and support the execution of your personal vision of success. When times with others have been difficult and I question my choices, I remember the poem by Mother Teresa which ends: “In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.”
Last night, I watched “Invictus”, a true story about Nelson Mandela, an inspiring man whose love for his country and fellow South Africans led him to make many choices that appears selfish to others. He read the poem of the same name by William Ernest Henley which inspired him to “stand while he felt like lying down” during his 30 years of incarceration. The famous words that began and ended the movie brought a surge of pride and peace through my body. He said, “I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul.”
Knowing this truth, feeling this inspiration, I have taken a huge leap of faith. I have chosen “the road less traveled” (thank you Robert Frost – I have always loved this poem) and expect it will make all the difference. We are entering a new year and a new decade after all. It is time for great change. It is time for greatness. This year I will turn 40. Isn’t it about time I started putting myself first? Lesson Learned.
For more on my philosophy, please visit my website: http:///embracingpotential.com.
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Letter to Santa
Dear Santa,
I trust that you and Mrs. Claus are in fine health and maintaining a good balance at home, work, play and peace at this demanding time of year. If your elves are embracing their potential, you likely have less to do on the shop floor and can focus on your personal vision of success – spreading joy to people all over the world at Christmastime. I would like to thank you for the work that you do. You are an inspiration!
Speaking of gratitude, I would like to share with you how thankful I am for the blessings In my life. My friends and family are all healthy and happier than ever. I am surrounded by people who love and support me. I am fortunate to be financially independent and attracting abundance in everything I do. This season is one of giving and I would like to start by giving thanks – for all I have and for the ability to share my talent, wisdom and love with all those in my reach at home, at work, at play and at peace.
I have a special handwritten note for you in my journal detailing my vision at home, at work, at play and at peace. I trust that you will be getting plenty of these from my friends this year who are taking time to invest in their own growth and development and who understand that asking for guidance and support is part of the process of executing on your vision of success.
Writing this letter to you has been a great experience. I am now very clear on what I value in my life and have reaffirmed my commitment to creating a life grounded in those personal values. Why don’t you just sit back and relax, Santa? I already have every that I need right here, right now. Lesson Learned.
I trust that you and Mrs. Claus are in fine health and maintaining a good balance at home, work, play and peace at this demanding time of year. If your elves are embracing their potential, you likely have less to do on the shop floor and can focus on your personal vision of success – spreading joy to people all over the world at Christmastime. I would like to thank you for the work that you do. You are an inspiration!
Speaking of gratitude, I would like to share with you how thankful I am for the blessings In my life. My friends and family are all healthy and happier than ever. I am surrounded by people who love and support me. I am fortunate to be financially independent and attracting abundance in everything I do. This season is one of giving and I would like to start by giving thanks – for all I have and for the ability to share my talent, wisdom and love with all those in my reach at home, at work, at play and at peace.
I have a special handwritten note for you in my journal detailing my vision at home, at work, at play and at peace. I trust that you will be getting plenty of these from my friends this year who are taking time to invest in their own growth and development and who understand that asking for guidance and support is part of the process of executing on your vision of success.
Writing this letter to you has been a great experience. I am now very clear on what I value in my life and have reaffirmed my commitment to creating a life grounded in those personal values. Why don’t you just sit back and relax, Santa? I already have every that I need right here, right now. Lesson Learned.
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