Is there something that you do repeatedly as an automatic response to a specific situation? Do have habits that you’ve been trying to break? Do they cause you regret or shame? Have you lost out on opportunities because the habits you have are hindering your progress on the path of success? I have asked myself these questions as they related to unconscious choices that I have made in many areas of my life over the years. As I choose now to live with deliberate intent, I am more aware of these patterns as my ego tests me to embrace my potential.
Habits are formed in the ego state – they are an unconscious repetition of patterns which do not serve your higher purpose. The ego taunts you, and you hear yourself saying: “It takes too much effort. Why bother? This is comfortable, familiar.” But it is really comfortable when your choices cause you dis-comfort either physically, mentally, emotionally or spiritually? You may smoke, overeat, bite your nails, overspend. You may look to dull the pain of loneliness with addictions to gambling, sex or work. Or your habit may come in the form of a relationship… one that makes you unhappy most of the time, but is still reliable in a sense. Whatever your habit, however it appears in your life, it is one you regret when you look in the mirror.
Take a moment – PAUSE. Ask yourself why you regret these choices? Know that it is because they are not allowing you to embrace your potential and execute your personal vision of success. Listen to your body… Do you feel tired? Do you feel anxious? Tense? These are all signs that your life is not in alignment with your true purpose.
In order to open yourself up to what is possible, you must first let go of old patterns… this may mean a job, relationship, or lifestyle. Breaking the habit is a difficult thing which takes determination and courage. Get clear about what you really want… craft your personal vision of success, and then start making new choices that will move you forward on that journey.
We have the freedom and power to live with deliberate intent. In every moment, we make a choice how we will respond. We make a choice whether or not to respond in a way which serves us. If you are struggling with a habit that is eating away at your self-esteem, self-confidence, or self-expression, make a conscious choice to TAKE BACK CONTROL. Step out of the victim role where you have been hanging your hat, and step into your authentic being. If you need help with this, following the PAUSE formula I have outlined in other blogs. Visit my website at http://embracingpotential.com.
Make a conscious effort to live deliberately. You’ll be amazed at what shows up! Lesson Learned.
Professional Motivator, Lisa Payne, finds inspiration in everyday events to help others embrace their potential.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Make a Wish
Remember when you were a kid and you’d read stories about a genie released from a lamp who would grant you three wishes? How hard was it to come up with three wishes? Not too hard, if I recall… and as you got older, AND SMARTER, you realized one of your wishes could be for more wishes!! Or you could wish for a pile of money and then you wouldn’t need the genie anymore!
In my last post I expressed my thoughts on whether money can buy happiness. It got me thinking more about how I would live differently if my income multiplied dramatically overnight. Taking it one step further: how would my life be different if I had unlimited time, energy and money. What would be on my wish list then?
Well, last week I made 10 wishes following instructions from one of my favorite websites: http://www.janspiller.com/index.php. I shared it with some other people and was surprised to hear that they had a hard time coming up with 10 wishes. Imagine! I wondered, “Where has that childhood enthusiasm gone?” I remembered then, from my workshops, that most people cannot easily articulate what their lives would look like if they had unlimited time, energy and money. They really need assistance. (If you need assistance, now would be a good time to check out http://embracingpotential.com/.) While this is great for my business potential (smiles), it does leave me with that question of why making a wish was so much easier when we were kids.
As we age, our minds become full of judgments and perceptions that ultimately create limiting beliefs. [I’m not smart enough. I’m not good enough. Nobody ever listens to me. I’m nothing special. I don’t deserve it. …] We all have our own; the bottom line is that they keep us small and sitting on the sidelines of life, unable to even WISH for success. Do you recall experiencing this negative self-talk? I certainly have. And then I get inspiration from this piece from Marianne Williamson (http://www.marianne.com/) that I have actually memorized:
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is
that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness
that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant,
gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You
are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is
nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure
around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born
to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some
of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we
unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are
liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
In my last post I expressed my thoughts on whether money can buy happiness. It got me thinking more about how I would live differently if my income multiplied dramatically overnight. Taking it one step further: how would my life be different if I had unlimited time, energy and money. What would be on my wish list then?
Well, last week I made 10 wishes following instructions from one of my favorite websites: http://www.janspiller.com/index.php. I shared it with some other people and was surprised to hear that they had a hard time coming up with 10 wishes. Imagine! I wondered, “Where has that childhood enthusiasm gone?” I remembered then, from my workshops, that most people cannot easily articulate what their lives would look like if they had unlimited time, energy and money. They really need assistance. (If you need assistance, now would be a good time to check out http://embracingpotential.com/.) While this is great for my business potential (smiles), it does leave me with that question of why making a wish was so much easier when we were kids.
As we age, our minds become full of judgments and perceptions that ultimately create limiting beliefs. [I’m not smart enough. I’m not good enough. Nobody ever listens to me. I’m nothing special. I don’t deserve it. …] We all have our own; the bottom line is that they keep us small and sitting on the sidelines of life, unable to even WISH for success. Do you recall experiencing this negative self-talk? I certainly have. And then I get inspiration from this piece from Marianne Williamson (http://www.marianne.com/) that I have actually memorized:
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is
that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness
that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant,
gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You
are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is
nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure
around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born
to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some
of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we
unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are
liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
Friends, we MUST dream big if we want to play in the big leagues. We must summon the courage to wish for success if we are to attract it. We must step up to the plate and take a swing if we hope to ever hit a home run. [Enter ego’s limiting belief] But what if we strike out? What if? At the very least, we will inspire others to try. As a parent, the greatest gift I can give my children is this example.
What if I make a mistake? What if I get hurt? What if I fail? I say, “So What??” It is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. It is in the journey that life’s reward is found and there will be no reward if you don’t take the first step. MAKE A WISH and enjoy the ride. You are worth it. Lesson Learned.
Show Me the Money!
Have you ever really considered what money means to you? The fact is, money provides you with food and clothes, puts a roof over your head, and it may even buy you a few pretty baubles on special occasions. When asked to ‘dig deep’, what many people answer is: Money gives you FREEDOM - the freedom from worrying about the necessities of life and, perhaps, to attract the ‘wants’ as well. In short, the freedom that comes with financial abundance is in peace of mind.
Is it possible that this peace of mind can come regardless of the number of zeroes on your paycheque? Do we need to continuously work overtime or take on extra assignments to increase our income in order to achieve the happiness we seek? Do we have to win the lottery to make our dreams come true?
Recently I was introduced a professional 30-something woman and asked what she did at the federal government job. She said, “Count the days until retirement.” My interest peaked and I responded, “What do you do on a good day?” The response: “Wait to win the lottery.” She wasn’t getting rid of me that easy! I asked, “What would you do with the money?” The response, this time, was more surprising: “I would do more good.” When I ask her to name two more things she would do if she won the lottery, she answered: “I’d be single and I’d travel.”
Imagine this woman’s shock when I told her that I had already fulfilled all three of her wishes WITHOUT winning the lottery.
When she recovered (I jest), we talked about how these things are quite possible and how fashioning the life of your dreams is completing within your reach but, putting first things first, you MUST change the belief that money is the answer to your prayers.
All joking aside, this exchange made me realize that it is common to believe that happiness is tied to the almighty dollar. By the time we reach adulthood, we are conditioned to believe one or all of the following: Money doesn’t grows on trees. Money is the root of all evil. Money can’t buy happiness but it sure makes the hard times more comfortable. You may look down on people who are poor and look up to people who are rich. Either way, your perception of money affects how you view the world and what you attract in your life. Any time that we blame our situation on lack of financial abundance, it is that lack that we continue to attract. You may not even realize how often you think this way but with increased awareness, you can alter your negative perceptions of money, change your focus from lack to abundance and achieve the success you desire, financially or otherwise.
The truth is that happiness, and success – however you define it – can be experienced when you have financial abundance, but the reverse it not true. Having financial abundance does not preclude happiness. Lesson Learned.
If you need help defining and executing your personal vision of success, visit http://embracingpotential.com/
Is it possible that this peace of mind can come regardless of the number of zeroes on your paycheque? Do we need to continuously work overtime or take on extra assignments to increase our income in order to achieve the happiness we seek? Do we have to win the lottery to make our dreams come true?
Recently I was introduced a professional 30-something woman and asked what she did at the federal government job. She said, “Count the days until retirement.” My interest peaked and I responded, “What do you do on a good day?” The response: “Wait to win the lottery.” She wasn’t getting rid of me that easy! I asked, “What would you do with the money?” The response, this time, was more surprising: “I would do more good.” When I ask her to name two more things she would do if she won the lottery, she answered: “I’d be single and I’d travel.”
Imagine this woman’s shock when I told her that I had already fulfilled all three of her wishes WITHOUT winning the lottery.
When she recovered (I jest), we talked about how these things are quite possible and how fashioning the life of your dreams is completing within your reach but, putting first things first, you MUST change the belief that money is the answer to your prayers.
All joking aside, this exchange made me realize that it is common to believe that happiness is tied to the almighty dollar. By the time we reach adulthood, we are conditioned to believe one or all of the following: Money doesn’t grows on trees. Money is the root of all evil. Money can’t buy happiness but it sure makes the hard times more comfortable. You may look down on people who are poor and look up to people who are rich. Either way, your perception of money affects how you view the world and what you attract in your life. Any time that we blame our situation on lack of financial abundance, it is that lack that we continue to attract. You may not even realize how often you think this way but with increased awareness, you can alter your negative perceptions of money, change your focus from lack to abundance and achieve the success you desire, financially or otherwise.
The truth is that happiness, and success – however you define it – can be experienced when you have financial abundance, but the reverse it not true. Having financial abundance does not preclude happiness. Lesson Learned.
If you need help defining and executing your personal vision of success, visit http://embracingpotential.com/
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Pleasure versus Happiness
Today I thought about pleasure. In fact, I’ve been giving it a fair bit of thought over the past week. I have been crystallizing my personal vision of success and have identified a number of things that bring me pleasure that I feel compelled to include. What I have learned about defining a vision of success, however, is that ‘the devil is in the details’. The more you try to fit in the ‘how’ of your vision, the less likely you are to achieve it.
The book I am currently reading, “The Art of Happiness” devotes a section to the question of whether pleasure and happiness are the same thing. The disparity is explained as pleasure being a short-term experience whilst happiness is a state of being. Your personal vision of success is all about the state of being you wish to achieve. When you begin from that higher level of consciousness, the goals that you set along your journey will always be in alignment with what you truly value.
As I mentioned, to achieve a sustainable state of happiness, I would likely be experiencing significant and frequent doses of pleasure. This leads me to believe that to have happiness, one must experience pleasure. But I do not believe the reverse is true. On occasion, I have even asked myself if the ‘pleasure’ is really a mask for the lack of happiness in one or more areas of my life.
We all know people who fill their lives with fun-filled adventure. To some, they appear to be living life large and are, perhaps, envied. To others, their sense of reckless abandon is perceived as entertainment without depth of meaning. Personally, I don’t believe such judgments serve anyone and the only truth will come from understanding one’s own motivation whether you are the thrill-seeker, admirer, or critic.
To be sure, we’ve all experienced the fleeting but intoxicating rush of adrenaline that comes with pleasure. It makes you feel invincible. It makes you feel powerful and strong. The tell-tale sign is how you feel once the rush is gone… are you able to sustain that feeling of happiness or is it lost until the next thrill comes around? As with most things, it is our gut that holds the answer. Trust it. Listen to it. Understand it and take the challenge to create a life full of happiness… there, you will find all the pleasure your heart desires. Lesson Learned.
The book I am currently reading, “The Art of Happiness” devotes a section to the question of whether pleasure and happiness are the same thing. The disparity is explained as pleasure being a short-term experience whilst happiness is a state of being. Your personal vision of success is all about the state of being you wish to achieve. When you begin from that higher level of consciousness, the goals that you set along your journey will always be in alignment with what you truly value.
As I mentioned, to achieve a sustainable state of happiness, I would likely be experiencing significant and frequent doses of pleasure. This leads me to believe that to have happiness, one must experience pleasure. But I do not believe the reverse is true. On occasion, I have even asked myself if the ‘pleasure’ is really a mask for the lack of happiness in one or more areas of my life.
We all know people who fill their lives with fun-filled adventure. To some, they appear to be living life large and are, perhaps, envied. To others, their sense of reckless abandon is perceived as entertainment without depth of meaning. Personally, I don’t believe such judgments serve anyone and the only truth will come from understanding one’s own motivation whether you are the thrill-seeker, admirer, or critic.
To be sure, we’ve all experienced the fleeting but intoxicating rush of adrenaline that comes with pleasure. It makes you feel invincible. It makes you feel powerful and strong. The tell-tale sign is how you feel once the rush is gone… are you able to sustain that feeling of happiness or is it lost until the next thrill comes around? As with most things, it is our gut that holds the answer. Trust it. Listen to it. Understand it and take the challenge to create a life full of happiness… there, you will find all the pleasure your heart desires. Lesson Learned.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Opening Doors
As one door closes, another opens to a world of possibility. As we close one chapter in our lives, we begin anew with the exhilaration of hope and maybe just a little twinge of fear. It is exciting to venture into foreign territory without a clear road map – to go for a while where the wind blows you. This requires faith that all things happen for a reason and that there is a greater plan at work than we can see today. It also challenges us to make choices that may be different than the past, take risks and experience the journey on a whole new level.
One of my favorite passages of all time is from Robert Frost: “Two roads diverged in a wood, and I -- I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.” I have felt, lately, that my choices are becoming more unconventional and it really has made all the difference – to my level of self-esteem, commitment, and ultimately, to my happiness. I have given myself permission to take big leaps and trust that I know what is best for me and my family at home, at work, at play, and at peace. I have begun to live deliberately and choices are becoming easier. When I am tested to take the easy road out of habit, I make sure I PAUSE (Pause, Accept, Understand, See, Embrace) before I say yes or no. By doing this, I allow for new opportunities to enter my life and can experience the journey more fully.
We have all made difficult decisions to turn the page and allow newness to enter in our lives. Whether it is a new career, a new relationship, a new home, all of these changes are great in that they test our courage and our faith. It does take courage to throw away that road map and follow your instincts. If you really listen to your higher self, you will make choices that are in alignment with your personal vision of success. You’ll find so much enjoyment and satisfaction in the journey that you’ll soon forget those fears that once kept you sitting on the side lines or kept you in the same game, making the same plays and getting the same results.
Today, I finished reading Neale Donald Walsch’s “When Everything Changes Change Everything”. He says, “Life meets its purpose through the process called Change.” It is what allows us to learn and grow. So close the door to the parts of your life that don’t serve you and open up to a Life of Possibility. ‘Sign Up’! Lesson Learned.
If you want to know more about Living in Possibility, visit my website: http://www.embracingpotential.com
One of my favorite passages of all time is from Robert Frost: “Two roads diverged in a wood, and I -- I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.” I have felt, lately, that my choices are becoming more unconventional and it really has made all the difference – to my level of self-esteem, commitment, and ultimately, to my happiness. I have given myself permission to take big leaps and trust that I know what is best for me and my family at home, at work, at play, and at peace. I have begun to live deliberately and choices are becoming easier. When I am tested to take the easy road out of habit, I make sure I PAUSE (Pause, Accept, Understand, See, Embrace) before I say yes or no. By doing this, I allow for new opportunities to enter my life and can experience the journey more fully.
We have all made difficult decisions to turn the page and allow newness to enter in our lives. Whether it is a new career, a new relationship, a new home, all of these changes are great in that they test our courage and our faith. It does take courage to throw away that road map and follow your instincts. If you really listen to your higher self, you will make choices that are in alignment with your personal vision of success. You’ll find so much enjoyment and satisfaction in the journey that you’ll soon forget those fears that once kept you sitting on the side lines or kept you in the same game, making the same plays and getting the same results.
Today, I finished reading Neale Donald Walsch’s “When Everything Changes Change Everything”. He says, “Life meets its purpose through the process called Change.” It is what allows us to learn and grow. So close the door to the parts of your life that don’t serve you and open up to a Life of Possibility. ‘Sign Up’! Lesson Learned.
If you want to know more about Living in Possibility, visit my website: http://www.embracingpotential.com
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Take a Flying Leap
A new year. A new decade. Time for a fresh start. Some might call it a Flying Leap. For me, it’s taken the form of a huge career change, leaving the security of a job that I have held for almost 13 years to embrace my potential and strike out on my own. Like any dramatic life change, this decision was not made quickly but over time and really doesn’t come as a surprise to anyone who is familiar with my journey. Just because a decision smolders over time, however, it isn’t easy to walk out that door, leave a part of your identity behind, and boldly strike out into the unknown. But that’s what I’m choosing to do.
This isn’t the first time I have done something like this. But I am no different than anyone. We’ve all made choices in our lives where we have left behind a part of our being and taken a leap of faith that our next adventure will yield even better results. Such changes are essential for our continued growth and development. It is exciting but, at the same time, it can give your butterflies butterflies.
I have been waiting for the right moment to take this big leap of faith, just as I have before. I have been mentally preparing myself for life beyond what I know for certain and that has been helpful as I have put my affairs in order. What all this preparation doesn’t take into account are the feelings that you experience when saying goodbye to your past. Whether you are changing your job, relationship status, or home town, there is an inevitable grieving process that needs to be experienced by us of all in order to move on without regret or doubt.
We all grieve in our own way and will let go of the past in our own time, when we are ready. By acknowledging that you are, in fact, saying goodbye to a big part of your life, you honour your past as it is what brought you to this moment.
As one door closes, another one opens. Take a breath and walk through this process: PAUSE. Accept what is and what has been. Understand the lessons and why your journey has lead you to this point. See what is possible in your new life. Embrace Your Potential.
The world is waiting for you to show your true colors! Be brave. Be bold. Take that leap. It is my Lesson Learned.
Visit my website: http://www.embracingpotential.com
This isn’t the first time I have done something like this. But I am no different than anyone. We’ve all made choices in our lives where we have left behind a part of our being and taken a leap of faith that our next adventure will yield even better results. Such changes are essential for our continued growth and development. It is exciting but, at the same time, it can give your butterflies butterflies.
I have been waiting for the right moment to take this big leap of faith, just as I have before. I have been mentally preparing myself for life beyond what I know for certain and that has been helpful as I have put my affairs in order. What all this preparation doesn’t take into account are the feelings that you experience when saying goodbye to your past. Whether you are changing your job, relationship status, or home town, there is an inevitable grieving process that needs to be experienced by us of all in order to move on without regret or doubt.
We all grieve in our own way and will let go of the past in our own time, when we are ready. By acknowledging that you are, in fact, saying goodbye to a big part of your life, you honour your past as it is what brought you to this moment.
As one door closes, another one opens. Take a breath and walk through this process: PAUSE. Accept what is and what has been. Understand the lessons and why your journey has lead you to this point. See what is possible in your new life. Embrace Your Potential.
The world is waiting for you to show your true colors! Be brave. Be bold. Take that leap. It is my Lesson Learned.
Visit my website: http://www.embracingpotential.com
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Life on Cruise Control - No More!
Welcome to 2010 - a new year and a new decade. Today, I resolve to become laser- focused on my personal vision of success and encourage you to do the same. It is my intention to inspire others to embrace their potential and in order to do so, I must live authentically, in alignment with my life’s purpose. I am making connections for success with people who have found the courage to stop living life on Cruise Control. This new decade can also mark the beginning of a new life – one that is designed by you, grounded in your personal values, and fashioned with deliberate intent – this new beginning is possible if you shift gears and take back control.
This is not a feat for the faint-hearted. It requires determination, commitment and passion. It can be hard work at times. Alternately, it is easy to drive through live on Cruise Control, keeping the same pace, staying in your designated lane. It is comfortable to know the route ahead of you is predictable and familiar. There’s no risk to maintain the status quo and accept the ‘same old, same old’ as being good enough. For many people, this sense of security gives them peace; others experience it as boredom. Sometimes, people experience a discontent but they are not quite sure what it is. They are seeking fulfillment and often cover it up with addictions to work, alcohols, gambling, or sex. In doing so, they become even less aware of their true potential and the life of possibility that awaits them.
The ‘danger’ of Cruise Control is that you are never fully aware of what is passing you by. You give over control of your journey. You don’t really ‘feel’ the road. I, myself, drove this way for many years. On a cross-province trip about five years ago, I realized that my mind was so bent on the destination (the time I would arrive, the route I would take, the cost of gas) that I failed to enjoy the beauty of the trip. Ours is a beautiful province and I had never taken the time to simply appreciate it. With this wisdom came the knowing that I was living my life this way, too. Goal-oriented to a fault, I was focused on the outcome at all times, on achievement and reward. I was successful in the eyes of many but what I lacked was happiness. I covered up that lack for a while, pretending to be someone that I was not, deflecting focus from myself to others whose needs I put ahead of my own. When I was clearly exhausted and my spirit significantly beaten down, I got real with myself and stopped living life on Cruise Control.
I knew that in order for me to experience true fulfillment, I had to make some deliberate choices that would bring my life in alignment with my personal values. I have been on this journey for several years now and the results have been remarkable. No more life on Cruise Control for me. Sometimes, I veer off course, arrive later than expected, and even break down. But, more often, my journey takes me to places that are more beautiful than I could have ever imagined. I am grateful to have chosen to experience life in possibility, enjoy the ride, and embrace my potential. This life comes with risks. Take a risk! Take a leap of faith for 2010! I have. Lesson Learned.
Visit my website http://www.embracingpotential.com
This is not a feat for the faint-hearted. It requires determination, commitment and passion. It can be hard work at times. Alternately, it is easy to drive through live on Cruise Control, keeping the same pace, staying in your designated lane. It is comfortable to know the route ahead of you is predictable and familiar. There’s no risk to maintain the status quo and accept the ‘same old, same old’ as being good enough. For many people, this sense of security gives them peace; others experience it as boredom. Sometimes, people experience a discontent but they are not quite sure what it is. They are seeking fulfillment and often cover it up with addictions to work, alcohols, gambling, or sex. In doing so, they become even less aware of their true potential and the life of possibility that awaits them.
The ‘danger’ of Cruise Control is that you are never fully aware of what is passing you by. You give over control of your journey. You don’t really ‘feel’ the road. I, myself, drove this way for many years. On a cross-province trip about five years ago, I realized that my mind was so bent on the destination (the time I would arrive, the route I would take, the cost of gas) that I failed to enjoy the beauty of the trip. Ours is a beautiful province and I had never taken the time to simply appreciate it. With this wisdom came the knowing that I was living my life this way, too. Goal-oriented to a fault, I was focused on the outcome at all times, on achievement and reward. I was successful in the eyes of many but what I lacked was happiness. I covered up that lack for a while, pretending to be someone that I was not, deflecting focus from myself to others whose needs I put ahead of my own. When I was clearly exhausted and my spirit significantly beaten down, I got real with myself and stopped living life on Cruise Control.
I knew that in order for me to experience true fulfillment, I had to make some deliberate choices that would bring my life in alignment with my personal values. I have been on this journey for several years now and the results have been remarkable. No more life on Cruise Control for me. Sometimes, I veer off course, arrive later than expected, and even break down. But, more often, my journey takes me to places that are more beautiful than I could have ever imagined. I am grateful to have chosen to experience life in possibility, enjoy the ride, and embrace my potential. This life comes with risks. Take a risk! Take a leap of faith for 2010! I have. Lesson Learned.
Visit my website http://www.embracingpotential.com
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)